Stolen Lines #4

Feeling both empowered and terrified as I drove into work, I looked up at the sky and started talking.

"Dear God, I know I should not be asking for anything right now but I am asking you to make everything okay. I know I should be thankful that I have a job, and good family and friends and an awesome dog, but it still feels like it all has come crashing down. Why me? I worked so hard, I knew the law? I could spit out the execution of a will in sing song form to the beat of thriller! Well I guess none of that really matters. I guess it all comes down to those damn multiple choice questions. God, can you please inflict slight pain to the people who developed those questions? I mean don't kill them or anything just sort of scare them a little. Perhaps maybe when one of the MBE people is eating breakfast one morning, they look down at their cereal bowl and a snake jumps out. I mean something really cool like that. Okay, I know I am supposed to forgive. But it is really hard, I mean how can my entire legal career be on hold because I can not tell the difference between:

a) D is not liable because his act was not the proximate cause of V's injuries
b) D is not liable because his reckless act was not the direct but for cause of V's injuries
c) D is liable because his really crappy act of bashing V's head with a baseball bat during a softball game was the cause of V's head exploding
d) All of the above
God, I am going to try this again, and I ask for your strength and support to get me through another grueling 12 weeks. But most importantly, I ask that you please show the MBE people how to be merciful...and if that doesn't work then can you just send me a copy of the answers. Thanks"
AMEN

*I Stole the first line of this post from Stay Tuned, by Jenniffer Weigel

Stolen Lines #3

"There's something that I've been thinking about and wondering about and I'm very curious: am I the only one who knows?"

Well sort of me, I mean yes. No one really knows the extent of it. "It" you know that thing we don't like to discuss. Yeah, that "shhh" whisper it my debt. I mean I have close friends that have a guess or a clue or can probably add a law school tuition and some lavish shopping sprees but no one "really" knows. The true extent, the true number, the fact that the credit card bills alone are in the double digits. Only you know my little secret, or our little secret. You only know because we are married. I mean you have a right to know you married a shopaholic, or that I have a problem. The weird thing is I am great with money, and great with financing and great with budgeting. We paid for our wedding - in cash. I paid for my $40,000 car in full (and not late once). I bought two properties before I turned 30 yrs old and have over $600K in real estate. So then why can't I figure out how to stop swiping? I have to learn to not buy those Italian suits, or Stuart Weitzman shoes or the $300 dress for that one event. Why do I pay a small mortgage every month along with my other 2 mortgages. I guess I will never learn. How do I know? Because I am actually looking at villas in Spain as we speak. For now? NO, for later, for retirement, for 30+ years from now....and I might also get a new pair of shoes to go with it. So don't tell okay...It's our secret.

*I stole the first line of this post from Then We Came To The End, by Joshua Ferris

Stolen Lines #1

"I tried to think of the right answer. Unable to think of that, I spoke anyway."
It was midnight or so on my wedding night, and she asked me if anything had changed. I said yes, I couldn't resist. The amount of champagne had taken over my rational conscious stream of thought and I blurted out what I really thought. People grow apart, it's okay that we are not as close as before. Our lives are different now, ad we just need to accept that. This was one of the most important days of my life and I needed you and you failed me. You dissapointed me and I did not feel that you were there when I needed you most. I will always love you, but this is for the best. The words may not have been exact since the alcohol still makes it all sort of fuzzy. Either way, it's been 6 months and we still have not spoken and I am okay with that. I occasionally have a thought of how she is doing but nothing that warrants a phone call. Sometimes if you cant think of the answer you need to speak anyway.

I stole the first two sentences from "Night of the Avenging Blowfish", by John Welter.