Monday, March 07, 2005
This is a test of the emergency broadcast system; this is only a test
Do we all have panic buttons? You know that little part in the back of your mind where you store all the things that scare you about the person you are dating. Gotta keep that button handy, just in case. For example "I just wrote a love song that won a VH1 award about my ex-fiance." (sorry dru) Warning! The girl not only had a fiancee, but she also wrote a love song about him. (love song worthy guy is tough competition) And I bet you it wasn't one of those hate songs like Alanis Morissette "You oughta know." For women, our panic buttons can be a range of comments like "I will never get married", or "I slept with my ex's sister (or ex's best friend)". I even remember I dated a Jewish guy once, and he told me "I need a nice Jewish girl". Bling! Bling! Did anyone else not see that panic button? Well I finally got it, and pressed it for a quick evacuation. The ejector seat almost didn't work, but I managed to get out without a scratch. You see, we all have reasons to bail. We may not see it at first, due to the lust, I mean dust, in our eyes. Girls, please do not discuss past lovers, and especially how good the past lovers were in bed (and definitely do not discuss size or girth). Men, should not discuss the fact that they want to be bachelors forever (even if true), and they definitely should not mention the great rack on your cousin (bad move). You see, some things are better left unsaid. Women will never reveal the fact that when they are dating a guy, they go home, and secretly think about which drawer he would get if he ever moved in. Panic! Panic! Men, run as fast as you can and please don't look back. The funny thing is while men probably never admit it, they are actually secretly thinking of which clothes they would bring for that drawer :) So lets all continue this game of charades, and keep our panic buttons handy for the quick exit if necessary.